AMA ZING Spring Bling

When Spring rolls around, dont'cha just feel you're trying to throw something off and spring to life? A certain joy fills you and I'm not talking about Corporate Spring Fever, (which TV-transformed itself from an innocent line in a Hollywood song to a patriotic medical syndrome - meaning, an excuse to sell you Corporate Adolph-Pharma's spring allergy drugs).

For those of you who find yourselves ... pick one or more...

• sneezing and wheezing
• moaning and groaning
• meeping and weeping
• mind floating and body bloating
• blaming and flaming
• hogged, fogged and blogged

... it's time to re-balance and cleanse your body and mind and spirit using the Medicine Cabinet of First Resort (MCFR)- your kitchen.

What exactly are you balancing? The Constitution! The Constitution of the United States of Who You Really Are!

What exactly are you cleaning out, getting rid of? AMA! Not just any "ama", THE Ama!

Well, yes, as initials, your brand-name recognition programming identifies the A.M.A. as the Anti-Christ Medical Association. Here it means AMA, pronounced "ama". How appropriate the lead agency for dispensing death-oriented medicine to America in this Age of Adolph, should be named after a bodily-produced substance that is the root cause of all sickness in humans. Holy Crap. Nay! Unholy Crap. Excrementissimus Vilus Iniquitus Lotharious ... EVIL ... like the entire Bush Crime Family, which embedded itself, like AMA, deep within the Global Body Politik, much less the last 6 US Administrations.

[Drum roll maestro, that WAS a good one! You'll NOT likely forget the name of this WOEFUL SUBSTANCE now, will you?]

While we exhort all good people to get rid of the Bush Adminstration from within the body politik, we also exhort all good people to gird themselves with good health in our battle of good vs. evil.

If you want to know what AMA personified looks like, view the corpusculent visage of Karl Rove, you can see pus-drizzled ama coursing in the bulging veins behind his eyeballs... watch Condoleeza Rice closely, if you can stomach it, and see the bile-flecked ama working her mouth and lips, as she spittles forth words in the form of dancing corpses...

We don't want to end up like that do we? Here's how AMA builds up:

EFFICIENT DIGESTION: Eat food, convert to nutrients or waste, all wastes flushed out. No AMA.

INEFFICIENT DIGESTION: Eat food, converts to nutrients or waste, some wastes flushed out, rest stuck in body in digestive system, bio-leaks into surrounding tissue, becomes more toxic, clogs up all tubing, including nerve channels, blocks flow of bio-electricity, known as chi, life force, body feels hogged (like Rove) flogged (like Condi, she was MKUltra programmed in one of the gifted child programs, watch her hand movements!) and blogged (like America?). Lots of AMA.

AMA is the ground in which bacteria, viruses, degenerative diseases, endocrine collapse, heart disease, cancers, diabetes, stroke, kidney and liver failure, substance addictions, including obesity take hold. And when the physical instrument is off, what the heck do you think happens to the mind and spirit? Duh! Like you didn't know this all is the black business of the AMA ...

Fasting and cleansing are the oldest therapeutic interventions known to man (i.e, Homo Sapiens, not Homo Adolpho Pharmo) . So, do not expect the AMA Medical establishment to back this up. This is not their clap-trap, this is the people's medicine, not corporate medicine. This is not AMA medical advice! This is how to get rid of AMA for GOOD!

AMA builds up when your digestive functions are not efficient. If you eat something not suited to your particular and precious constitution, which makes you spectacularly and only you, AMA will build up. If you eat something old that cannot be digested, AMA will build up. If you eat something when your digestive system is off, AMA will build up. When you eat processed or artificial foods, AMA will build up.

That's sort of obvious. What's not so obvious is this: drinking ICE COLD BEVERAGES when eating food shuts down the digestive "fires". This is what a famous Chinese Jewish doctor said about drinking ICE COLD beverages DURING meals:

"YOU GET BIG BELLY - BIG BEER GUT! IN WOMAN, SHE GET GUT HANG DOWN BELOW POOPIK, VERY SAD, EVEN SCARE RATS."

The rest is just common sense:

• DON'T EAT HEAVY FOODS IN THE EVENING
• DON'T EAT WHEN FULL OR BEFORE THE LAST MEAL IS DIGESTED
• DON'T EAT WHILE DISTRACTED, OR NOT MINDFUL.

Okay so we're filled with the treacherous AMA, what's a body to do? Cleanse it out. We already talked about it, the Tridoshic Trump Cards are the way to go, as well as a few other cleansing tricks. It's not rocket science or a bloody mystery, folks. How about simply slowing down the eating. Slowly.

• Eat fresh and light like spring... and tridoshic
• Drink warm water throughout the day.... take a tip from Buddha Cat...

  Kitty likes his tea. In the morning and last thing at night, he insists on a bowl of warm water, that has been thoroughly boiled and allowed to cool to the correct temperature for his pretty little nose. He also wants a drop or two of fresh lemon juice in it. Believe it or not. This is a kitty, who if you forget to do this, will "call you" over, and as you bend down, will reach up with a soft paw and swat you as reminder. No scratches mind you. Then when you bring him his tea, he'll lick you on a specific meridien which will make you feel loopy-happy.

• Quick, warm oil body self-massage right before morning shower - Coconut is good, sesame is preferred.
  
• Cook with detox spices such as Cumin, Chili, Coriander, Clove, Fennel, Ginger, Turmeric which also happen to keep the digestive fires burning efficiently.

AMAZING BUT TRUE STORY

I sprouted a whole bunch of Mung beans which looked marvelous, they were such eager little sprouts - the ones I verbally encouraged embedded their little roots practically before my eyes into the paper towels in their joy to grow; damn things sprouted an entire inch over one night!

With equal and misplaced enthusiasm, the next day I rewarded them their yearning to live and express themselves, by scarfing them down, devoured every last one (Insert picture).

[I hope the vegetarian nazi's reading this understand that every living thing has some sentience and it was just as life-taking doing the sprouts in, as it was doing the fish in. I predict that only when vegetarian nazi's get this will all war will stop on this planet.]

Within 4 hours I was rewarded with terrible abdominal cramps which told me there was a lot of AMA in my body, and my digestive fires were low, and I should really cool down this gung-ho lets clean-up and re-balance, Ein, Zwei, Drei, Heil, Heil, (goose-stepping music now) Cleansing Macht Frei! I know, that damn Austrian blood in me gets going when the AMA is in town.

AMAZING RECIPES
I devised a great mung sprout recipe which my stomach loves and is very tridoshic. Excuse me while I call it simply amazing. That's right, a-m-a----z-i-n-g.

AMAZING

Ingredients
1 cup freshly spouted mung beans (sprouting instructions below)
1 cup grated carrots
1/2 cup brown rice if you can get it
1 lemon
1/4 cup dark brown sugar
Fennel
Coriander
Cardamom

Method
Heat a little olive oil in a pan and add the spices toss in the mung beans and stiry fry til the edge is off the beans, add everything else, and remove from heat.


MUNG BEAN PANCAKES

In Japan, these are eaten like rice cakes. They are so tasty I can't seem to get any left over in the fridge past one day.

Ingredients:
1/2 cup finely chopped fresh ginger
1/3 cup soy sauce
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup whole wheat flour
2 cups mung bean sprouts
2-3 tablespoons of olive oil
2-3 tablespoon sesame oil
Ground cayenne pepper

Method:
In a bowl, mix the ginger, soy, salt, wheat flour and water. Stir in the mung beans, and make it into a pourable batter of pancake like consistency, just a bit thicker.

Heat the oils in a large skillet over medium heat then reduce to low and pour in just enough batter to make a medium plate sized pancake, make sure it's thin and not too thick. Cook about 4-5 minutes on each side.

The best way to flip this pancake is to get another skillet same size, place over the pancake skillet and turn over, then transfer the flipped pancake to the cooking skillet. Do this over a cutting board so you can retrieve your mistakes with dignity.

You can drizzle some tamari or soy sauce over this, it is delish.